Why Matchmaking Matters More Than Ever: 23 Years of Curating Love with Intention

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

Exhausted by modern dating? You’re not alone.

With endless swiping, ghosting, and superficial connections, many successful singles are quietly asking: Is this really the best way to meet someone meaningful?

I’ve been answering that question for over two decades.

When I launched Linx Dating 23 years ago, the dating world looked very different. Matchmaking wasn’t trendy—it was often misunderstood, even dismissed. But I saw what others didn’t yet: a hunger for real, lasting connection built on values, alignment, and trust.

Fast forward to today, and that need has only grown stronger.

A Thoughtful Alternative to the App Ecosystem

Unlike dating apps—where you’re expected to vet strangers, protect your own safety, and guess someone’s intentions—Linx offers something much more refined.

We handle the legwork.

We curate each introduction.

We protect your privacy.

We honor your standards.

Your time is valuable, and your heart is not a commodity. Preferences around religion, family, and lifestyle aren’t secondary—they’re central. Our process is discreet, personalized, and deeply intentional.

A Cultural Shift, Now in the Spotlight

The release of the new film The Materialists is just the latest proof that private, elite matchmaking is no longer a hidden service—it’s part of the zeitgeist.

In the film, a luxury matchmaker plays a central role in a storyline about status, love, and self-worth. While satirical in tone, it captures a growing truth: the smartest, most emotionally mature singles aren’t wasting time—they’re investing wisely in their relationships. The culture is catching up to what I’ve always known.

More Than Matches—It’s a Partnership

At Linx, clients receive far more than names.

They get coaching.

Wardrobe guidance.

Date feedback.

And quiet confidence that someone is in their corner.

Yes, premium matchmaking is an investment—but one that can transform your entire life. While no service can guarantee love (this is life, not a transaction), what I bring is 23 years of pattern recognition, deep human insight, and a rarefied global network of exceptional individuals.

Because love isn’t about quantity—it’s about alignment.

And when it’s right, one introduction is all it takes. 

The Hidden Currency of Relationships: Communicating What Matters

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

In Debora Spar’s insightful article “Some Things Are Sacred: How Economics Can Help Us Protect What Matters,” she points out something we don’t talk about enough in dating: relationships often break down not because people don’t care, but because they never clearly communicated what they value.

At Linx, I see this play out constantly—even among the most self-aware, successful individuals. Spar calls these deeply human experiences “sacred goods”—things like emotional safety, loyalty, respect, and affection. These are priceless to us, but they don’t come with a visible price tag. We assume others should just know how much they matter, but without clarity, even the most well-intentioned relationships can fall apart.

Spar argues that if these sacred goods really are so essential, we need to get better at understanding and expressing what they mean to us—and to the people we love. In traditional markets, we’re taught to state value clearly. In dating? We often expect mind-reading. We downplay our needs, sugarcoat our wants, or try to be "low maintenance," only to feel unseen or misunderstood later.

That’s why one of the most important things we do at Linx is help clients get radically clear. Clear on who they are, what they’re looking for, and what they're ready to offer in return. This kind of communication isn’t just about compatibility, it’s about alignment. It’s one thing to say you want a relationship. It’s another to say, “I want to build a life with someone who prioritizes emotional depth, shared goals, and openness.” The difference isn’t subtle. It’s transformational.

We also talk a lot about emotional reciprocity. Spar notes that sacred exchanges are mutual—they require both parties to invest. If one person is doing all the emotional "producing" and the other is just receiving, things will eventually collapse. Whether it’s making plans, initiating vulnerability, or expressing appreciation, the healthiest couples understand that value flows both ways. If it doesn’t, it’s not sacred. It’s one-sided.

This is why I stress that matchmaking isn’t just about introductions. It’s also about giving people the tools to navigate the emotional economy of modern relationships: how to articulate your needs, how to listen, how to show up, and how to ask for more without guilt or fear.

So often, we’re taught that romance should just “happen,” that the right person will intuit everything we need. But the reality is, meaningful connection—just like any high-value good—requires clarity, intention, and mutual effort.

At Linx, we believe your emotional life deserves the same respect you give to your career or finances. Because when you’re clear on your value and willing to communicate it, the right person doesn’t just hear you—they recognize you.

Master “Cobbler” of Connections: Curated Matchmaking for High-Achievers

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

Matchmaking is one of humanity’s oldest traditions—long before swipes and algorithms, there were trusted matchmakers - the expert “cobblers” of connection. Like a skilled cobbler who knows every shoe’s story and carefully mends and shapes each pair to ensure a perfect fit, matchmaking has always been a craft requiring patience, intuition, and deep personal knowledge.

At Linx Dating, this timeless tradition is alive and thriving. For over 20 years, we’ve dedicated ourselves to working with a very small, elite group of high-achieving individuals—primarily Silicon Valley entrepreneurs, investors, executives, and creatives—helping them find relationships that truly fit their lives and aspirations.

What sets Linx apart is the intensely personal, hands-on approach I bring to every step. I personally review each and every application that comes through our network. Not only do I hand-input all the data myself (a laborious process that few take on in today’s automated world), but I also personally respond to every applicant. This level of care and attention is simply unheard of in today’s matchmaking landscape.

Why go to such lengths? Because understanding every nuance—the stories, values, hopes, and even the fears—behind each client is essential to creating introductions that matter. This painstaking work is how I identify connections that others (including a lot of technologies as well) miss. It’s why our clients trust Linx with some of the most important decisions of their lives.

Linx Dating is neither about volume, nor about relying on technology to do the heavy lifting. It’s about real human connection, absolute discretion, and the artful craft of matching people with intention and care.

For those who expect excellence in every area of life, Linx is a trusted partner for finding love that fits.

Navigating the “Are You Divorced?” Question During Separation

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

At Linx Dating, we coach our clients through some of the most nuanced aspects of modern dating—including those emotionally loaded, often unexpected questions that can leave someone feeling unprepared or exposed.

One such moment just happened to a female client of ours. She’s navigating a high-profile divorce, emotionally and romantically long removed from her marriage, yet still in the thick of legal and financial finalization. During a date with a man who got divorced many years ago, he gently asked, “Are you actually divorced?”

While likely innocent in intention, the question landed like a punch. She wasn’t expecting it. It felt vulnerable and intrusive. And she didn’t know how to answer without sounding defensive or insecure.

Here’s the truth: In states like California, where the divorce process can be particularly complex and prolonged due to financial or custody matters, “divorced” isn’t always a black-and-white status. You can be emotionally done, romantically detached, and building a completely new life—and yet, still be technically “married” on paper.

So what do you do when someone asks, and your answer is more transitional than final?

Here are three ways to handle the “Are you divorced?” question with confidence and grace:

1. Lead with Clarity, Not Shame

You don’t need to apologize for being in transition. Instead, lead with emotional truth and firm boundaries.

“I’m in the final stages of my divorce. While the paperwork is still being finalized, the relationship has been over for quite some time. I’m clear, open, and emotionally available for the right person.”

By naming where you are with clarity, you communicate emotional availability without needing to defend your timeline.

2. Read the Intention Behind the Question

Sometimes this question is rooted in curiosity or a desire to understand, not judgment. For example, a widow may see divorce as uncharted territory and want to better understand your experience.

Instead of reacting, pause and ask yourself: “Is this person trying to disqualify me—or are they just trying to understand me?”

That subtle mindset shift can move you from feeling exposed to feeling empowered.

3. Redirect to Shared Values

If the conversation starts to veer into uncomfortable territory, gently redirect the conversation to shared values or future-oriented dialogue.

“The paperwork is in process, but what matters most to me is creating something new with someone I deeply respect and connect with. I’m excited about what’s next.”

This frames your response not around the past—but around who you are today and what you’re building.

Dating is vulnerable. Full stop.

And transitional periods—like separation or divorce—can bring even more layers of sensitivity, especially for high-profile individuals. What matters most is not defending your status, but owning your story. It’s okay to still be in progress and to date while in that space—so long as you’re honest with yourself and your matches about your availability and readiness.

At Linx, we champion our clients through these nuanced spaces, helping them stay grounded, confident, and emotionally agile—no matter the question.

Connections that Count: Mastering Networking in Silicon Valley

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

Networking is one of the true cornerstones of living and thriving in Silicon Valley. When I initially started my business in 2003, I immediately placed myself in the middle of events that were high-value and target rich -- I wanted to mix and network with like-minded entrepreneurs. Early on, I found out about the first location based social network called “Meetro.”

The founders of Meetro would put on networking events in "real life.”  I started by attending their bowling nights in Palo Alto, which truly put me completely out of my comfort zone as I wore a pink bowling shirt, ugly bowling shoes, and played against different entrepreneurs. It was goofy, it was silly, and it was plain old cheap fun. I met some great folks and remember handing my business card to a lady named Jessica. I didn’t think much of that particular contact other, than that I was trying to be friendly, hand my card out, and meet lots of new people. 

A few weeks later, Jessica called me and shared details that she was a reporter with the San Francisco Chronicle and inquired in a very kind way if she would be able to do a story on my teeny tiny matchmaking biz. I was completely surprised that she even remembered me, let alone wanted to do a story on Linx Dating. Delighted, I agreed and was interviewed over the phone. It was going to be a story right in time for Valentine’s Day. The day before the story was supposed to come out, she asked if she could get some images of me and proceeded to send a San Francisco Chronicle photographer down to meet me. We snapped a bunch of photos. She later shared, “Amy, rumor is, I think you might get the front cover of the newspaper!”  

February 14, 2007, my story came out and basically occupied the ENTIRE front page of the prestigious San Francisco Chronicle. I literally could not believe my eyes! Link to story

My business changed overnight and has never ceased growing! As an entrepreneur, I will be forever grateful to Jessica for that tremendous opportunity.  Beyond the friendships I made, all of this created incredible business opportunities and great business contacts. I met a man named Baris Karadogan who guided and periodically mentored me in my little Palo Alto office. Professionally, he spent ten years as an Stanford educated engineer, ten years in VC, and as a CEO. Most recently, he is CEO of a tech platform called Jingle.

A quick plug about Jingle….If you ever need fresh foods, beverages, etc., download the Jingle app - Jingle is a super cool food and services delivery platform. In a nutshell, it’s a very cost-effective marketplace for fast, direct deliveries from mobile stores and services.  In fact, at my recent networking event “Mix n Mingle” in Menlo Park, we hired Jingle to provide all of the beverages for our guests and boy was it a hit!  One of his VC mentors provided him business advice years ago and it has always stuck with Baris as a solid mantra, "Everyday you spend in the office at lunch is a waste.” What’s this mean exactly? Get out of the office at lunch, go outside, learn from people. Networking is paramount to being successful and everyone should make it like a second habit. Great advice!

Baris attended my 20th anniversary party for Linx Dating and shared this beautiful tribute on his social media. I was so touched. Baris didn’t need to do this but he did. 

"Some friendships are special. I met Amy about 20 years ago at a VC bowling event and she told me she was thinking of starting a matchmaking business.  I listened, tried to help every now and then and Linx dating was born in a tiny office in Palo Alto. As her business grew, so did our friendship. We both had families - each had kids, and we shared birthday parties, trick or treat walks, and were always there for each other. No matter what life threw at us, we always could grab a coffee or a glass of wine, and tell each other our happy and sad stories.  Twenty years later, Linx is a big success and we have been friends for 20 years.  It’s been a real pleasure walking parallel to the path of Amy’s life. I am utterly grateful to call you a dear friend. Thank you and here’s to 20 more years.” 

I will end this with a favorite quote by Woody Allen that Baris lives by: “Ninety percent of success in life is just showing up.” This is so true. I showed up to the Meetro event and that greatly impacted my career in ways I never could have imagined, and the professional dividends are still paying out some 20 years later!