5 Types of People to Walk Away From in Dating

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

In my two decades as a professional matchmaker, I’ve learned that people show you who they are very early in dating. The challenge is that when we’re hopeful, lonely, or dazzled by chemistry, it’s easy to ignore those early signs. But clarity at the beginning is one of the most powerful tools you have.

Here are five types of people I advise my clients to walk away from—and how to handle it if you find yourself already caught in the dynamic.

1. The Love Bomber

Lavish gifts, over-the-top affection, and declarations of love after just a date or two can feel intoxicating. But love bombing isn’t about building intimacy—it’s about fast-tracking trust so they can get what they want. It often signals insecurity, immaturity, or even manipulation.

Action Step: Slow the pace. Opt for grounded, simple dates and see how they respond. If they respect your boundaries, that’s healthy. If they pressure or guilt you, that’s a red flag.

2. The Breadcrumb Giver

They send a steady drip of attention—texts, compliments, vague plans—but never follow through. It’s just enough to keep you emotionally invested, but not enough to create real momentum.

Action Step: Be direct. Try: “I’m looking for someone who prioritizes meeting in person. If that’s not you, I wish you well.” Clear communication either prompts action—or reveals their lack of seriousness.

3. The Egotist

Conversations revolve around them—their career, their stress, their stories. At first, you may find their confidence appealing, but over time you’ll realize there’s no space for your voice.

Action Step: Redirect. Ask: “What would you like to know about me?” If they consistently deflect or minimize your experiences, you’re not dealing with a partner—you’re dealing with a performer.

4. The Window Shopper

They flirt, they date, and they enjoy companionship, but when it comes time to commit, they stall. You’ll always feel like you’re on display but never chosen.

Action Step: Clarify intentions. Ask: “What are you truly looking for right now?” If their answer is vague or evasive, trust it. Don’t keep yourself “on the shelf” for someone who doesn’t have the courage to choose you.

5. The Houdini

One day they’re all in, the next day they vanish without a trace—only to reappear later with a casual “Hey, how’ve you been?” This inconsistency isn’t a mystery to solve; it’s immaturity and lack of readiness.

Action Step: Address it head-on. Say: “Consistency matters to me. If you can’t communicate regularly, I don’t think this is a fit.” The right partner will step up. The wrong one will fade—and that’s your answer.

Final Thought

Dating should feel clear, kind, and reciprocal. The wrong people will drain your energy with mixed signals, ego-driven behavior, or half-hearted investment. The right person will bring consistency, ease, and emotional safety.

At Linx Dating, I remind my clients that walking away sooner isn’t failure—it’s discernment. Every “no” clears space for the right “yes.”

Dating Is a Tango: The Art of Rhythm, Tension, and True Connection

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

There’s a quiet magnetism in watching two people tango. Their bodies move with purpose—close, then apart, never chaotic, always in conversation. The most beautiful moments aren’t choreographed—they’re felt. Just like dating at its best.

At Linx, we believe dating isn’t something to power through or solve. It’s something to experience, much like a dance. This week, we’re exploring how the tango offers a perfect metaphor for building a meaningful connection—and what it teaches us about reciprocity, chemistry, and emotional presence.

Set the Frame: Know Who You Are Before You Step In

In tango, the “frame” is everything. It’s your posture, your balance, your readiness to connect. In dating, your frame is your self-worth.

If you don’t know your values, what lights you up, or where you draw the line—how can anyone dance with you? The most successful relationships start with someone who’s deeply grounded. Confidence isn’t arrogance; it’s emotional alignment.

Ask yourself: What do I stand for in love? What’s a dealbreaker—not because it’s a preference, but because it violates who I am?

Learn to Lead… and to Follow

Modern daters often feel unsure of how much to initiate or when to lean back. The tango reminds us: it’s not about who leads all the time—it’s about responsiveness.

Powerful daters know how to show interest without losing mystery. They take the lead when it counts—and just as importantly, they make space for the other person to rise, initiate, and reveal. A relationship built only on your effort is a monologue. Great relationships are duets.

Let the Tension Build

In tango, it’s not constant closeness that creates intensity—it’s the space in between. The step apart. The eye contact that lingers. The restraint.

We live in a culture addicted to instant answers and “closure.” But some of the most electric moments in dating come from the unknown: the slow burn of curiosity, the silence before the kiss, the pause that says more than words.

If you rush to fill the gaps, you miss the beauty of anticipation. Let tension exist. Let it build. That’s where real chemistry is born.

Don’t Dance Alone

Tango doesn’t work if only one partner is moving. The same is true for dating. If you're doing all the reaching out, all the planning, all the emotional labor—you’re not in a relationship. You’re in a performance.

Healthy love is reciprocal. It’s built on mutual investment, attention, and vulnerability. If you feel like you're always leading while your partner stays still, ask yourself: is this really a dance, or am I on stage alone?

When It’s Right, It Feels Like Flow

The best part of tango is when both people surrender to the rhythm. They're not calculating every move—they're feeling it. They’re attuned, alive, and present.

When dating flows, it doesn’t mean it's effortless. It means you’re with someone who matches your energy, your curiosity, your openness. That’s when dating stops feeling like effort—and starts feeling like art.

When He’s Not Taking It to the Next Level: Why You Can’t Wait Forever

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

You’ve invested your heart.
You’ve made space in your life.
You’ve been patient. Understanding. Loyal.

But still—he hasn’t made a move.

Not toward exclusivity.
Not toward engagement.
Or worse… he proposed, and now the engagement lingers indefinitely.

At Linx, we work with exceptional women—smart, successful, emotionally generous—who want to build lives with someone extraordinary. And far too often, we meet them after they’ve spent months… even years… waiting for a man to “be ready.”

Here’s the truth: you can’t build a future with someone stuck in the pause.

1. If It Feels Like Limbo, It Is

A relationship should feel like forward motion—not a holding pattern. If you’re constantly wondering when he’ll step up, commit, or get serious, chances are… he won’t. Not because you aren’t worthy, but because he isn’t ready. Or worse, he’s comfortable—right where things are.

2. Words Are Easy. Watch His Pattern.

He says he wants a future. He talks about “someday.” But when it comes time to make plans, take steps, or define the relationship—he freezes.

A man’s actions tell you everything. If his pattern is avoidance, deflection, or procrastination, then you’re not his priority. You’re his safety net.

3. Engaged… But Not Advancing? That’s a Message.

We often romanticize engagements—but forget they’re meant to lead somewhere. If a man proposes but then resists planning, avoids conversations about marriage, or seems indifferent to timelines… that’s not “taking things slow.” That’s avoidance wrapped in sentiment.

You’re not “pressuring” someone by wanting to move forward. You’re honoring your life.

4. He’s Not Confused. He’s Comfortable.

This is the hardest truth:
A man who truly wants to be with you will not stay confused for years.

“Not ready” often translates to “not willing to change.”
And as long as you continue to give him everything—your support, your time, your heart—without requiring him to meet you where you are, he’ll stay comfortable. Because comfort costs him nothing.

5. You’re Not Asking for Too Much. You’re Asking the Wrong Person.

There is nothing unreasonable about wanting commitment, momentum, or clarity.
There is nothing “difficult” about setting standards.

The right man will feel inspired by your vision—not threatened.
The right man will move forward—not drag his feet.

Final Thought: You Can Leave the Waiting Room

The next level doesn’t come from nudging, begging, or outlasting his doubts. It comes from choosing yourself. From honoring your time, your value, and your desire to build a life that moves with intention.

If he won’t meet you there, step out of the waiting room.

Because the right partner?
He’s not hesitant.
He’s ready—and already walking your way.

Real Love Is a Soft Landing, Not a Tightrope

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

We live in a culture that often mistakes intensity for intimacy.
But in my work as a matchmaker—and in my own life—the relationships that last are not the ones filled with drama, ambiguity, or constant performance.

They’re the ones that feel… peaceful.

Real love is a soft landing. Not a tightrope.

You shouldn’t feel like you're walking on eggshells all the time, bracing for the next reaction or filtering every word. That’s emotional tension—not emotional safety.

The healthiest relationships offer:

• Room to breathe

• Space to be fully yourself

• Support during hard moments, not withdrawal

• Calm more than chaos

This isn’t about settling.
It’s about not settling for instability disguised as passion.

The most meaningful relationships are the ones where you don’t have to shrink, chase, or question.
They’re built on consistency, clarity, and co-regulation.

So if you’ve been on the tightrope—
Maybe it’s time to find the soft landing.

Character Is Sexy. Standards Are Everything.

By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating

In both love and leadership, character is the foundation.

It’s what sustains trust when charm fades. It’s what keeps you anchored when things get hard. And it’s what separates surface-level connection from something truly lasting.

Recently, I had the opportunity to hear General Stan McChrystal speak at Stanford. His message—rooted in decades of leadership and service—was clear: True character isn’t about being perfect. It’s about how we lead ourselves when no one is watching.

In his book On Character, McChrystal challenges us to push beyond performance and polish. He urges us to lead with moral clarity and personal accountability—to stop outsourcing responsibility and start living by the standards we claim to value.

The best leaders—and the best partners—lead with humility, conviction, and values that don’t waver under pressure.

And no one modeled this more fully than Abraham Lincoln.
He didn’t chase popularity.
He didn’t adapt to please the crowd.
He stood for principle.
He led with clarity, calm, and deep moral responsibility.

That same energy belongs in your dating life.

If you want someone of high character, start by being someone of high character.

That means:

• No more waiting for the “right” person to show up.

• No more blaming timing, apps, or ghosting.

• No more lowering your standards to feel chosen.

You have agency. You are not stuck.
You are in charge of who you choose, what you allow, and how you show up.

The moment everything changes is the moment you accept full responsibility—not just for your outcomes, but for your energy, your effort, and your standards.

Don’t chase chemistry. Choose character.

Don’t hope for integrity. Require it.

Don’t wish for connection. Build it—with someone who’s done the work, too.

Ask yourself: What am I choosing in love right now? And more importantly… who am I becoming?

Because in dating—just like in life—you don’t get what you want.
You get what you’re willing to walk toward with courage, clarity, and intention.