By Amy Andersen, Founder and CEO of Linx Dating
In my two decades as a professional matchmaker, I’ve learned that people show you who they are very early in dating. The challenge is that when we’re hopeful, lonely, or dazzled by chemistry, it’s easy to ignore those early signs. But clarity at the beginning is one of the most powerful tools you have.
Here are five types of people I advise my clients to walk away from—and how to handle it if you find yourself already caught in the dynamic.
1. The Love Bomber
Lavish gifts, over-the-top affection, and declarations of love after just a date or two can feel intoxicating. But love bombing isn’t about building intimacy—it’s about fast-tracking trust so they can get what they want. It often signals insecurity, immaturity, or even manipulation.
Action Step: Slow the pace. Opt for grounded, simple dates and see how they respond. If they respect your boundaries, that’s healthy. If they pressure or guilt you, that’s a red flag.
2. The Breadcrumb Giver
They send a steady drip of attention—texts, compliments, vague plans—but never follow through. It’s just enough to keep you emotionally invested, but not enough to create real momentum.
Action Step: Be direct. Try: “I’m looking for someone who prioritizes meeting in person. If that’s not you, I wish you well.” Clear communication either prompts action—or reveals their lack of seriousness.
3. The Egotist
Conversations revolve around them—their career, their stress, their stories. At first, you may find their confidence appealing, but over time you’ll realize there’s no space for your voice.
Action Step: Redirect. Ask: “What would you like to know about me?” If they consistently deflect or minimize your experiences, you’re not dealing with a partner—you’re dealing with a performer.
4. The Window Shopper
They flirt, they date, and they enjoy companionship, but when it comes time to commit, they stall. You’ll always feel like you’re on display but never chosen.
Action Step: Clarify intentions. Ask: “What are you truly looking for right now?” If their answer is vague or evasive, trust it. Don’t keep yourself “on the shelf” for someone who doesn’t have the courage to choose you.
5. The Houdini
One day they’re all in, the next day they vanish without a trace—only to reappear later with a casual “Hey, how’ve you been?” This inconsistency isn’t a mystery to solve; it’s immaturity and lack of readiness.
Action Step: Address it head-on. Say: “Consistency matters to me. If you can’t communicate regularly, I don’t think this is a fit.” The right partner will step up. The wrong one will fade—and that’s your answer.
Final Thought
Dating should feel clear, kind, and reciprocal. The wrong people will drain your energy with mixed signals, ego-driven behavior, or half-hearted investment. The right person will bring consistency, ease, and emotional safety.
At Linx Dating, I remind my clients that walking away sooner isn’t failure—it’s discernment. Every “no” clears space for the right “yes.”
